She writes:

A letter to you:

I will not cry this time. I will not be a victim of yet another form of abuse. Yes when he hurts her, he is hurting me and therefore I will not allow him to hurt me even more than what he already have. I will not cry today or tomorrow but instead I am taking action. Instead I am letting him know today that it is not because I hate him, it is not because I am afraid of him, it is not because he is any powerful than I am, it is because he have to know what is right from wrong. I am sure its not his fault and therefore learned it from his parents, the past generation, I am sure he have been nothing but a powerful force of the generation to generation victimization and blame, but today I will be breaking that chain. Today I refuse for you to hurt me, for you to beat me, for you to rape me, I refuse for you to look down on me, to psychologically abuse me, to humiliate me, to burn me, I refuse for you to intentionally or unintentionally create an art of violence on me. So today when I am taking action, I will repeat this to you and will reflect it in my work, in my life, and in my being. I refuse for anyone to hurt me because I am a woman. Because I am a woman, I should be respected, loved, cared for and because I am a woman, I should be your number one, because I am a woman I should be treated as the center piece that I am to my family, my community, and to my country. Today I take action for my great grand mothers, my grand mothers, my mothers, my aunties, my daughters, my nieces and today I am taking action for those women who weren’t able to speak out, those women who weren't able to fight back, I am then fighting back for all of them, I am to take action because more than any of the labels I have and been referred to, I am taking action because I am a human being who deserves love, respect and a human being that creates a generation that without me the next generation is impossible.

If justice would be served as a meal I wonder what it would taste like!

Then why is the law, which is supposed to be protecting us, harming us? When a criminal, a murderer is being let go after serving 4-5 years but a man who have cheated the government with VAT (Tax) gets mandatory 15 years without parole. Now, I am neither the critique of the century nor am I against my current rulers of my beautiful Ethiopia. Its just that I am more concerned of what is right from wrong, what is something we are ashamed of as a nation from what is more logical! Maybe I don’t know enough, maybe I know too little about Ethiopia, maybe I am mistaken of the possibilities and sacrifices one pay for growth and development in Ethiopia, maybe I am just f*ed up in the head for ever thinking that a murderer should get 85 years in prison or a person who raped a child should get 50 + years. Maybe it’s a f*ed up way to think that a man who committed a tax crime should get 5-10 years max. In my weird way of thinking I might just be wrongly right to think that way. Maybe that is it, I am wrongly right. A man who splashed pure acid on his ex girlfriend burning her face, hair, destroying her one eye would probably get 5 years causing her to be “handicapped” for the rest of her life and he gets 5 f*ing years? I am not just speaking for the hell of it, it is from experience a man who had done the same thing got 2 years a few years back and now he is able to work, able to lead a normal life when the woman he had caused so much pain and suffering to is depending on her family and friends for the rest of her life, but he is able to live freely getting opportunities to travel, to marry & bare children if he may wish. One might ask, how is it then justice served in this beautiful country? I would answer “right now justice is served as a cooked up ‘doro wet’ with cheese” Which leads me up to question does the justice we (When I say ‘we’ it is to refer to the normal people) all know exist in Ethiopia? I honestly don’t think people who are making these laws, are being influenced to make these laws, responsible to review the law are aware of the meaning ‘justice’ because the justice I know wouldn’t have been tossed out in the trash bin by the court house right after recess, the justice I know would have been served raw, raw collard greens with jalapeño with some choking and kicking. I am sure many would wonder if he had gotten the justice he truly deserves 2 years and out on probation. Many would also think and argue that he had done the right thing to her because of the pain and suffering she had caused him maybe he was hurt, emasculated because she cheated on him. Maybe she stole his money, maybe she even emotionally and physically abused him maybe she even spread rumors ( rumors is as bad a criminal act in Ethiopia as it is referred to ‘destroying’ ones reputation) but regardless of what she had caused him regardless of the pain he had endured for a ‘limited time’ does then our government gave him the right to cause her a lifetime of pain? Does it even realized that she is forever scared when he had just been slapped on his hands with an emotional hug. As an Ethiopian, an individual, as a woman, as a daughter, a sister, and a future mother I’m requesting a vise versa on the law, just a little twitch, just a tad bit. May be on the thinking line of someone causing the government some money cheating on VAT (Tax) gets 5-10 years without parole and a person causing someone to be scared for life can get 25+ without the possibility of parole or if you would really listen to me and my advice, maybe to teach the up and coming generation from being a part of such crime, maybe it should be like it in the old days, an eye or an eye, the man who burned his ex with sulfuric acid would also be burned with sulfuric acid and 2 years, the man who took out his ex’s eyes would also get his eyes taken out and 3 years with parole it is. At least he will be out in time to live a normal life. Maybe he will be the model for the rest of the irresponsible cruel monsters who thinks women are ones property and therefore if a woman wishes to leave her ‘man’ , he have the right to harm her and possibly destroy her so no man would ever get to give her some love an affection.

Now if justice was a meal, I would serve it on a hot plate, I would serve everything raw, raw collard green with raw intestine with jalapeño, mitmita, and berbere with some cows penis and my favorite some rats waste (atleast its cooked in the stomach). All raw! But then again, in this beautiful country of mine, it is served on a warm plate with some delicious doro, kitfo, some cabbage and carots, some rice and some cheese so colorful and delicious.

How raw or cooked would you serve justice?

What makes you different? What is it that sets you apart from the rest of the world? Your colleagues, your friends? your family? What is that makes you unique? Do you even take time out to notice it or do you go along by what people say about you? Well, this question came to mind this morning as i was getting my coffee from Starbucks and the lady at the counter said to me "You are different" for a minute i was thinking maybe she meant to say i was black? or maybe my accent? may be something else? do i come off as snobbish? Oh dear lord i thought about so many things in a second, then i looked up and said "how?" she smiles and says, "you smile in the morning". 

Well, yes i do! I try to smile all the time. Everyday! 

People say to me,  the first thing they think about when they are reminded of me is my smile. I don't have perfect teeth. i even have a gap. My top teeth is looking forward while the bottom is looking up. It aint all that white as man made things have managed to discolor it a bit. (we will not mention here) 

So what is it about you that people notice? What is the positive thing that people are always reminded of you with? Is it a smile, silliness? Is it a wink? or is it your positive attitude? 

What makes you different? What sets you apart from the rest of your friends? I just hope the one thing that sets you apart is something positive. 

-Just saying! 

One thing i have noticed in Ethiopia or anywhere else where the people of color (black) live is the connection they develop with one another while doing their hair. On my 1 year and 1/2 stay in Ethiopia i saw this connection, felt this connection and remembered a bit about my childhood as my aunites and neighbors used to do my hair we called Shuruba.

Sitting in on the bottom and the person who is doing the hair usually sits either on a chair or stands to be able to do your hair. They use a tiny comb to split the thick volume of hair and create a design that fits your face and in a way where all of your hair can be split in bits and pieces and it forms a line, a square or any other design or shape to get all of your hair. So what is it about this connection people remember? For me it was the chit chat, the laughter, the "ouch it hurts moments" and the feeling of a person tightening up your strands of hair together so it wouldn't look messy or unattractive. The neat look, the design, and the proud look of the stylist is usally what did it for me. "so pretty" "this looks so nice" "it looks good on you" usually the comments given and with a blushing smile, you know the design and the new hair do is what will set you apart from the rest of your friends. Your shuruba is your pride until it gets messy that is.